Learning to apologize can be difficult. There was a time when I thought apologizing was saying I was wrong. That is not always the case. Sometimes we are apologizing because we are sorry about how our words or actions hurt someone's feelings. Apologizing is not about someone was right and the other person was wrong. Apologizing can be a win-win situation.
Apology: an admission of error or discourtesy accompanied by an expression of regret |
Sometimes practicing an apology out loud with yourself, in front of a mirror, can be helpful. The best apology is made in person, face to face. Sometimes that is not possible, and a phone call may suffice. Remember our body language and tone can speak just as loud as words. The least personal would be email or text. Sometimes, it might be easier to write or text the apology. If this is the case, asking the person to call or meet to discuss further might be helpful.
"Never ruin an apology with an excuse." Benjamin Franklin |
Ephesians 4:32 ESV "Be kind to each other, tenderhearted, forgiving one other as God in Christ forgave you."
Romans 12:18 ESV "If possible, so far as it depends on you, live peaceably with all."
1 Thessalonians 5:11 ESV "Therefore encourage one another and build one another up, just as you are doing."
Keep the end goal in mind. When apologizing to your Lover(husband/wife). The goal should be that you both are able to forgive each other and have resolution.
When apologizing to someone else, ask yourself a few questions:
*What is the reason for the apology?
*Is this relationship able to be reconciled?
*Is this an apology that may not result in reconciliation?
Lastly, I would remind you that you can only be responsible for yourself, you can not make the other person forgive you. There are times when apologizing is only the first step and time may be needed for forgiveness to be fully given.